Like...The Car?

When I first heard this song....I pretty much was like...WAH?? Are they talking about the car?  What is this?  What the heck is slizzard? WTF?

Then it grew on me...and I don't know why I like it.

Now I'm just dreaming up sipping on Captain and coke and boogie-ing it up with Cheri like the good ol days.  And that makes me sad.  :( Boo.  This would totally be our jam if we could go dancing again.

You Can't Always Get What You Want

This song is for you picky ass lady that just came in the caffe.

So I'm venting for a second.

I HATE...HATE HATE HATE when people come in and scowl at the desserts.  What is god's name are you coming in here to get if you are going to scowl at everything in the case and make a face every time you ask what something is?  Here's how this just went down:

Lady enters
Me: Good Morning! *smiles
Lady: HI!  *points at stands on top of case* What are these?
Me: *Points at each* These are scones.  This one is Lemon Blueberry and this one is Maple Pecan.
Lady makes ugly face at second listing of scones and says: EW NO...I'll have the Lemon Blueberry
Me: OK *goes to package up the scone
Lady: What is this in the bowls on the bottom?
Me: Banana Pudding
Lady: EW! That's even worse!
Me = starting to get annoyed but rings her up
Lady points to another thing in case and says: What is this?
Me: Peanut Butter Brownie
Lady breathes out annoyed and says: UGH no...I don't like that either
Me: oh
Lady: The cheesecakes look good but EVERYTHING else is just not my thing
(MIND YOU...we have an assortment of things in there...I'd say its probably something for everyone, cupcakes, brownies, cheesecake, bars, etc etc etc)
Me: Would you like me to warm up the scone a little for you?
Lady gives me disgusted weird look and says : I suppose
Me *goes to warm up scone, returns and hands it to her.
Lady: THANKS! *smiles and walks out
Me once she's gone: WTF!

OK.  Now maybe it's just me, but I know I wouldn't walk into someone's business and sit there making faces at everything like I am just purely disgusted.  She didn't buy a coffee, so obviously she came in with the intent to get something to eat.  And to sit there and just criticize everything in the case!  Personally, I wouldn't want to offend the business owner/person working, but apparently this lady just didn't care.  I'm hoping she saw the look of shock on my face when she was bitching about everything.
I'm sorry Ma'am that you are a hag and don't like anything (well except the cheesecake, but I'm sure she would have complained about the price had she tried to buy some).  Maybe next time, I'll be sure to hook up my mind reading device and have exactly what you do like ready for you!

People just have no consideration!  I mean, we obviously get the (more often than not) people that look at the desserts and sarcastically proclaim it all looks "terrible" "gross" "so bad," etc etc etc, but we understand that they are just joking around.  You don't come into a place that makes desserts and just be downright Debbie Downer.

So Thank You Lady in the Pink Shirt with too much negative opinion for your own good...You've made my day...and my blog blast!  I dedicate the above song to YOU!

<3 Me

This guy really is bizarre, but the flower made me laugh

HE'S SINGING!!  hahaha

OH silly filmcow.com guys

A new TYPED entry

What I hear: Golden Years, David Bowie

And I title it like that because I have been writing a LOT in a journal lately. There is a novelty actually sitting down and physically writing in a journal rather than just typing on an online blog. Granted, no one can read what's on my mind that way, but I seriously doubt anyone would find much interest in what I have to say anyhow.
Another thing about typing this right now is that it's kind of hard to sit here typing this all out on my iPod. And I'm REALLY relying a lot on the auto correction thing to fix my mispelled words. Should be interesting to go back later having to fix all the typos. Haha! I'm using someones open wifi connection. I am grateful for that much at least. I don't have to be completely disconnected from the world when I'm at home!

Something that's been on my mind a lot lately: how much I used to write before I had all these things to do. I have found so many started story ideas and poetry that I just abandoned. I honestly feel like I don't possess the ability to express myself in a creative, written way. I used to LOVE to write when I was younger. In my early 20's (groan...I hate being older) I would write ALL the time! I really should attempt to write something worthwhile soon...instead of just slapping down whatever happens to be on my mind at the moment. I want to write with purpose...so who knows.
Off to bed...to my crazy dreams. Night!

Raise your weapon

What I hear: Raise Your Weapon, Deadmau5



Rippin my heart was so easy, so easy
launch your assault now,
take it easy
Raise your weapon, raise your weapon
One word, and it's over
Ripping through like a missile
Ripping through my heart
Robbed me of this love
Raise your weapon, raise your weapon
and it's over

Curb your ego, you won't feel a thing
always number one
the pen with a bent wrist, crooked king
Sign away our peace for your war
One word and it over
dropping your bombs now,
on all we built
How does it feel now, to watch it
burn, burn, burn?
Raise your weapons, raise your weapons
and it's over

(first Chorus)

How does it feel now to watch it
Burn, burn, burn?

(1st chorus)

(2nd chorus)

**********

I adore this song and it was equally amazing to hear it live. Was the last song that he performed. I love it love it love it! Have to settle for listening to it on YouTube as it hasn't been released yet.

Opinions?

B

Wow I'm tired

I've been a bad blogger.  *smacks own hand
I know I haven't updated in forever.  Not that anyone probably cares.  No one ever comments on my blogs so I am assuming that no one reads them.
Anyway
I've been killing myself at Caffè Stella for the past 3 weeks.  It's been an education thats for sure.  I'm learning how PICKY people can be with their food and even more so with their coffee.  WOW.  AND of course, we've had our share of crazies.  My personal favorite we have nicknamed "28 seconds".  This particular character earned his name after trying to school me on how to make an espresso the RIGHT way.  Well this was probably our first or second day...I had only the minimal training from the previous owner and thought I was doing it the right way, so how would I know that you have to pull the espresso last after you've prepared everything else that goes into a drink.  He also informed me that after 28 seconds (hence the name) the coffee starts to go bitter.
WELL...I got some training and inquired about the 28 second thing and the trainer told me you shouldn't run the water through the grounds longer than 28 seconds or it takes away from it and makes the coffee bitter.  SO yeah "28 Seconds" was kinda right but still...he's kinda full of himself and he's a mixed European...with a pot belly. We think its funny he walks around like he's the grand pooh-bah of Caffè Stella! lol
We also have our nice, normal regulars which we love!
We've learned that there are definitely some weirdos that frequent coffee shops now.  Maybe its because they are hopped up on the caffeine.  Who knows?  haha
Just in case you haven't seen our page on Facebook yet (http://www.facebook.com/caffestella), here are some of our absolutely divine goodies we bake in house. Drool to your hearts content

Turtle Cheesecake 

Lemon cake with Lemon Buttercream icing

Orange Dreamsicle Cupcakes

 Red Velvet Cupcakes

Raspberry Limeade Cake

What's that?  Is that drool all over your keyboard I see?  HAHA!  Yep they look pretty scrumptious huh?  I decorate the cakes and make the cupcakes too (or most of them I have....I do the Red Velvet ones for sure! lol)

I officially have no life now and I live to serve coffee and desserts!  If you live in the Atlanta area, definitely come and check out the cafe!

I'm going to try to blog more lately since I have a computer readily available (its just coordinating my thoughts with the available time I have between customers!)

*waves goodbye and sings "oh my starry eyed surprise, sundown to sunrise..." lol

Later taters!

BranDivah

Caffe Stella

Well, I haven't written in a little while. I went from having absolutely nothing to do every day, to cleaning, organizing and trying to get this cafe in shape for it's inspection so we can open soon.
Yep, Mom bought Caffe Stella this past Thursday. I was in there Friday Saturday and Sunday just cleaning cleaning and more cleaning. What a mess! We had to throw out all the food they left behind. I cleaned out all the storage containers. All the dishes are getting cleaned. The oven, the fridge, the freezer...all clean. I think all I really need to finish is organizing all the clean storage bins and dishes, finish cleaning the oven, sweeping and mopping and it's pretty much ready to go. Fingers crossed.
Mom found out today that she has to have someone come out and give us a report on the cafe's grease trap. We have to call an exterminator as well. This is all required prior to going in and speaking with the planner for someone to come out and inspect. And all the money...yipes. I honestly wish we were a little better off so I could help take care of some things. It's because of that reason I am pretty much just busting my ass trying to do whatever I can to help. I'll be going over there in the AM (hopefully i don't sleep in) and will be getting back to work. Hopefully mom can get done what she needs to get done with the fire marshal and all that tomorrow. HOPEFULLY

So yeah...busy busy busy. This is definitely an experience just trying to get this place open. The thing that is kind of driving me and making me feel like it will be successful is the fact that people are coming by. I had one lady come by and almost rip my arm off because she was so excited the cafe was going to open back up! I've been directing people to check out our fan page on Facebook...here's a link just in case:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/pages/Lawrenceville-GA/Caffe-Stella/111166152255422?ref=ts

I really am looking forward to opening. Once all the stressful gov't stuff is over and done with, I think it will be a VERY exciting time in there. Mom and I are both very excited about trying out some new recipes on these people to see what they think!

SO anyway. I'm going to head to bed as it is...3AM....got lots to do tomorrow!

Depressed Whale

I love FilmCow.com....its the most random, stupid stuff ever....

And this is going to be really short because I really have nothing interesting to say.  ENJOY!

Beach goer

Have I mentioned lately how much I LOVE Tybee Island and the beach?

We're planning to visit Savannah in about a week to participate in the Tybee 5K.  David is going to run it, whereas my fat butt will TRY to walk it as fast as I can.  And once all is said and done...we're going to just spend the whole day at the beach....sigh

I really do love the beach.  I love taking pictures there as well (see above and following).  Which is pretty much why I am writing this blog today.  I'm just so excited to go!  All the pictures I am posting today were all taken on film btw.  I know...how Old Skool right?  The above picture I took a couple years ago of a very large piece of driftwood...

Let's see what else I have...

This is a different piece of driftwood on the opposite side of the island

Jetties on the North Beach

Sand pipers taking flight after I spooked them

The iconic Tybee Light

The pier on a very misty morning

Jetties on South Beach near where we were married

This is everyone's favorite picture.  Tide was really low (you can barely see the water at the end).  I just had an idea to stand under the pier and shoot a "light at the end of the Tunnel" picture...I love it

David actually took this picture but it was my idea....and my hand.  I love it though

And I have TONS of pictures of just adventures to the beach with my sis in law.  We always have a great time.  I'm sure I will have some to add after next weekend!  Hope you enjoy the pictures!

Diva minus the H

I googled myself today.  That's always interesting.  And i must say, that I am definitely one of a kind SN wise.  About 75% of the 204 results google gave me were actually sites/things I use or have used in the past...

Everyone always asks me why I spell my SN the way I do.  Honestly, its so I stand out.  I never have a problem getting the name when I use a new site I have to register for.  It kind of makes me feel good that I thought of something so silly that it actually works for me and that no one else has tried to use it.  That might sound silly to people, but so what?  So if you think its me, it most likely is (that is unless its something that seems out of the ordinary for me....then I don't know what the heck you're looking at! LOL)

It may sound even sillier to people to know that I feel more like myself when I express myself online.  Why I can't act in RL the way I do when I roam the web is beyond me.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not introverted in the least.  I used to be when I was younger, but you grow out of that.  I feel like I can freely say the things I want to say without worrying what people are going to think of me, because honestly, 98% of the people I talk to online...don't even know me for real..  Some of them, I wish I did know in RL, because I have met some really interesting and amazing people.  Lots of whom I truly care for.  I love my good friends and I mean that.

Anyway.  I just hadn't updated in a few days and just found that google thing slightly amusing.  Google your own SN and see how unique you really are ;)

Happy Easter

Happy Easter Everyone!

David's been hard at work on his Corvette trying to get it fixed up!  I've been playing on the computer mostly, but just made some Magic Cookie Bars that smell amazing and am going to TRY to resist the temptation to nom on them.  They are currently cooling and we don't have to leave for another hour at least, so....I might chuck em in the fridge to get them to cool faster.  Am pretty much just using today as an excuse to practice something.  I need to.......

HOLY CRAP!  There's a bumblebee in my apartment! EEEEEEEEEEK

*runs off to coral the bee out of the apartment with a broom

That was the dumbest insect.  Just kept flying into a corner behind my TV and then every time I would get it out of the corner it would fly at me then turn around and go back in the corner.  After about 10 minutes I finally got him out of the house.  That is the second large insect I have had to deal with this week.  It was a wasp on Monday.  Thankfully that one just kind of clung to my broom and i just tossed it outside.  I think they might be getting in through my fireplace somehow because they certainly aren't following us through the door. UGH...I'd complain to management, but they won't do a damn thing anyway.  BAH!

Anyhow, as I was saying.  Magic Cookie Bars...they're cooling.  I wanted to practice them because Mom has them on her list of things she wants to make for the cafe if she manages to get it.  She also insinuated that I would be the one to go get the food handler's certified....yipee...lol.  I just hope she goes through with it instead of letting someone take away her desire to do it. *Glare

As of right now, we're waiting.  Hopefully can start moving forward tomorrow ;)  It's all her and I can only let her know my piece so much.  Since I never got a call back for that job I interviewed for, I'm pretty much banking on this right now.

(Have I mentioned how yummy it smells in here? lol)

So anyhow.  I am taking these delightfully yummy smelling  treats to my cousin's house for dinner this afternoon.  So I might have to sneak a TEENY TINY bite of one just to make sure they are ok... ;)

Again, Hope everyone has a Happy Easter!

♥ ME

I'm feeling guilty/Customer DIS-Service

First off...how could you not love that face?

So, I have to just confess this and get it off my heart.  I hit my kitty out of anger tonight.  NOW NOW...I didn't beat her...it wasn't like anyone needs to call animal services or anything.  She's just a stubborn ass and keeps peeing on the floor instead of the litter box.  Granted, it was on the linoleum so I was able to clean it up easy, but what pissed me off was that I almost stepped in it and it just made the room smell.  This isn't something new and normally I'll just get annoyed and clean it up.  Tonight though, I got so pissed, I dropped my grocery bags on the floor, went over, picked up the cat and took her and stuck her nose in it (yes I know this trick doesn't work on cats...they stubborn and independent and going to do whatever they want anyway).  I then popped her on her butt and then...I popped her on her nose...pretty hard.  I didn't mean to hit her as hard as I did and when she slunk away, I immediately regretted it, but continued to yell at her.  I cleaned up the mess, still angry, and as I was rinsing out the sponge and putting the cleaning spray away, remorse hit me like a "mo-fo". My heart started to hurt.  I went to the cat (who has re situated herself on the couch) sat on the floor in front of her and like an idiot, apologized.  I went to pet her and she flinched and this is where I lost it.  I just sat on the floor bawling my eyes out.  My heart hurt just knowing that I caused some distrust in this sweet cat that loves me unconditionally.  After about a minute of me crying, she starts to purr, leans over and licks a tear off my face.  Forgiveness, it really is a blessing.

Here's another just because I love her so:

OK second topic:

I don't know why I am about to waste my brainpower on writing about this, but I need to vent.  This is the catalyst I think for what happened in the first topic.  

I go to Walmart (wonders if a round of "oh here we go" is going around).  This isn't the first time I have ever said this, but it merits saying over and over.  WALMART HAS TERRIBLE THE ABSOLUTE WORST CUSTOMER SERVICE EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

That being said, let's talk about what happened tonight.  I go around Walmart doing a little bit of grocery shopping.  First thing that annoyed me was that they were doing some MAJOR stocking (which is understandable considering tomorrow IS friday and EVERYONE gets paid Friday...everything they stock tonight will surely be gone by tomorrow!).  It wasn't the fact that they were stocking that annoyed me, it was the fact that all their pads of boxes were EVERY FREAKIN WHERE!!  You couldn't even walk down an aisle without having to lift the cart over boxes or press yourself against a shelf just to reach around a tower of boxes to get what you need.  I couldn't shop fast enough.  THANKFULLY the other half of the store wasn't 15 feet deep in boxes and I was able to get my contact solution and get out.

Here is what gets me though.  There are TONS of people in Walmart shopping...this was 11pm mind you.  They have 3 fast lanes (10 or less items) open and 2 (technically) regular lines open.  I have a good 25 items so I jump into a regular line with about 3 carts in front of me.  The people in front of me don't seem to have a lot to check out with and I'm wondering why the hell they didn't go down to the fast lane to check out, but oh well.  Maybe the line will move fast and I can get out.  OH...MY...GOD.  I shouldn't have thought that.  About 5 minutes after I get in line, I haven't moved maybe 2 inches and the girl turns her light off.  Well screw that! I was in line before she turned the light off, so she's GOING to check me out.  And I sit there watching her, moving....as.....slow....as.....possible.  She grabs and item, scans it and puts it in the bag like she's on break.  She keeps stopping to talk to this girl standing behind her.  She keeps leaning over after EVERY SINGLE ITEM she scans to see how many people are in line.  I, on the other hand, being 2 carts behind the current customers checking out, am making it no secret I am annoyed with having to wait already 10 minutes in this line.

I see two managers walking out talking to one another.  I see one manager go up to the girl, tells her something, and then walks over and helps some man with a cigarette purchase.  Then, manager gets on intercom and requests assistance at the front checkouts.  "Thank god!" I'm thinking.... WRONG!!!!

No one shows up.  Slow checkout girl FINALLY finishes with the people she's been ringing up for 10 minutes.  The people in front of me step forward, put their (maybe 10) items on the belt.  I start to grab one of those divider things and the girl turns around and just walks away....WALKS...AWAY!!!  She hasn't spoken to a single customer the whole time I have been standing in line and its obvious the whole time she's more concerned with leaving than doing her freakin job and she just walks away.  The people in front of me turn around and look at me and I'm getting pretty pissed.  And then, the manager comes over and jumps on the register. (Oh ok...he must have told her to leave once she finished with the previous customers...)
He rings them up and they go on their merry way.  He gets to me...doesn't greet me, doesn't even say a WORD to me the whole time, not even my total.  Just throws my stuff in bags....WAY too much stuff in a bag.  I'm having to rebag things because one bag had already broken.  And when he's done, he just kinda shoves my receipt at me and doesn't say thank you at all.
ME = EXTREMELY PISSED....

I snatch the receipt from him and stomp out. These people are lucky I didn't ram them with my shopping cart! Oh and speaking of shopping carts, the whole parking lot was full of them.  These idiots are even too lazy to get outside and clean up the cart mess.  Seriously...it was only 11pm.  There had to have been 1 person who could do that right?  Maybe they were all involved in the World War of Stocking in the grocery side...who knows.

As someone who has worked in retail, with the main focus in every job I have had being customer service...I certainly take offense when people are just downright rude and idiotic.  At one point I was thinking to myself that I wish I could secret shop Walmart, but then I took it back.  Every Walmart I have ever been in has had a SUPREME lack of customer service.  So I even decided against writing to Walmart (hell I could have even sent them a link to my blog...take that Wally World), because honestly, what good would it do.  When a person in a leadership position can't even display proper customer service...it isn't worth wasting my breath.
(But I love to write so yeah for readers who made it this far.  Thanks for reading at least)
So I blame you, employees of Walmart.  You brought out an evil side of me tonight and you were the catalyst to me hurting my pet.
*Gives Walmart the finger

Gorgeous

So, it's amazing outside now.  I'm loving all the sunshine and the warm weather!  It really is gorgeous...no clouds or anything.  I love seeing that blue sky (but I prefer it on the horizon of the ocean iykwim).  I haven't had too much on my mind to really write about lately.  Just stressing out a little over the job situation still.  I had an interview today for a leasing consultant position that I'd LOVE to get.  The interview didn't last but 20 minutes, but I felt pretty good about it.  They said they would be in contact by Friday if I make it to the next round.
Then there's the cafe.  I think Mom is pretty set on buying it.  So either way this week goes, in the end, things will work out and I won't have to be stuck at home every stinking day bored out of my mind.

I have been thinking lately of making a video just for the heck of it.  I'm in one of those weird moods I suppose. It will most likely be just random things, mostly music based.  I dunno yet. Check back to see the insanity (if it actually occurs).

I'll write more later when I have something interesting on my mind.  For now I'm kind of blank!  I welcome suggestions to write about though.

It might be in our future...

MEET CAFFE STELLA

I went to visit this cafe yesterday with my mom.  It's REALLY cute on the inside...all star themed (hence the name.  They even have strands of lights criss crossed across the open ceiling to simulate stars at night!  For example

Mom had told me all about this place and I HAD to come check it out.  It is just too adorable!  Their main business is just Coffee and Desserts.  We sampled a couple of these desserts yesterday and YUM!  Very good. Why blog about it though?  Well...Mom is VERY interested in buying it.  And I am very interested in helping her run it.  

When David and I found out we were going to be moving up to Atlanta back in November, my first thought was, "Well now Mom doesn't have to always say If only you lived up here we could do this."  Now here I am....4 months back in Atlanta and still jobless (although and I am still clinging to hope for a call back from a job that sent me an application tomorrow or Tues).  I'm readily available to do whatever needs to be done and ever since I started learning how to decorate cakes, I've pretty much wished I had a place where I would have the equipment and room to do it.  WELL, if we had this place I could make and decorate cakes :) And not just that, but all sorts of desserts!  My mom makes the absolute BEST Cheesecake...(and I don't care if anyone else doesn't believe it...until you try it you can't tell me otherwise...NO ONE has ever said they have had better).  AND I love to bake.  My only boss would be my mother and she's been bossing me around for most of my life ;) lol (LOVE YOU MOM!!!)

Personally, I am hoping Dad is agreeable to us pursuing it because it really would be a dream realized.  The only down side is that we live 30 mins away from this place.  AND that they normally open at 630 in the morning! EEK...

My other opportunity that I am curious to hear back from is for a leasing consultant job.  I've applied to several jobs and not heard a thing back from them.  On Thursday I got a call and an email requesting that I fill out the attached application on my email and fax it back to them ASAP.  I know it would be a pretty well paying job...it would REALLY help us get out of some bills and get things taken care of so maybe we can start looking into a house in the near future.  

I've made it pretty clear to my mom (or I hope I did) that I want to do the cafe, but at the same time I can't turn down a job if its offered to me...if she doesn't wind up buying it and I do turn down a job then I'm stuck in a rut again....I'm going mental with no job and with one income.  It makes things VERY hard!

So what do you think?

In case you hadn't noticed

I posted my playlist on here.  It looks stupid but whatever.  I can't live without music and I constantly change plays on it, so....whenever you are reading my blog you will have something to listen to.  TURN UP YOUR SPEAKERS PEOPLE! lol

Short update on the working out.  Last week I was really lame...I worked out ONE day.  SO yesterday we went to workout (not without a LOT of whining).  It was hard because we were both so tired, but we did it.  Even after not working out for a week, I jumped back on that treadmill and I actually ran for 2 1/2 minutes without stopping. UM...WOW! Seriously.  My legs were burning so bad, but I just pushed through the pain.  I was determined to prove to myself I could do it!  SO, as soon as my dear husband gets home, we're hitting it again.  Will update with progress when I return! ;)
Bye for now

UPDATE:
Well I pushed myself more today...I ran for 3 full minutes without stopping! YAY!  Now if only the scale would reflect some of the hard work I'd be happy.

Another

Afraid by Nelly Furtado

(only posting the lyrics of the part speaking to me right now...on video starts at about 1:08)

You wanna spread your wings but you're not sure
Don't wanna leave your comforts
Wanna find a cure
We're afraid of who we see in the mirror
We wanna let go but it feels too pure
Who wants to be alone in this world
You look around and all you see is hurt
But the light it always finds us
If we move with a little trust

Always in my head

C ~ ♥

Ecstasy by ATB
(video with song below)

Have you ever noticed,
That I’m not acting as I used to do before?
Have you ever wondered,
Why I always keep on coming back for more?

What have you done to me,
I’ll never be the same I'll tell you for sure
I’ll never be the same I'll tell you for sure
I’ll never be the same I'll tell you for sure

You really are my ecstasy,
My real life fantasy (oh yeah)
You really are my ecstasy
My real life fantasy (oh yeah)

Not that I’m complaining,
A more beautiful vision - I have never seen
If you don’t mind me saying,
A lifelong ambition to fulfill my dream

What have you done to me,
I’ll never be the same I'll tell you for sure

I’ll never be the same I'll tell you for sure
I’ll never be the same I'll tell you for sure

You really are my ecstasy,
My real life fantasy (oh yeah
You really are my ecstasy,
My real life fantasy (oh yeah)

You really are my ecstasy
(There can be no other While we still have each other)
My real life fantasy (There can be no other
While we still have each other)

You really are my ecstasy,
(I'll never be the same,
I'll tell you for sure)
(There can be no other
While we still have each other)
My real life fantasy, oh yeah
(I'll never be the same,
I'll tell you for sure)

I Really Did That?

Yesterday I did something I've never done before.  I went to the gym, completely exhausted from running around all day and only getting 3 hours of sleep the night before, and got on the treadmill to workout (seriously I NEVER do that).  My husband has been helping to motivate me and keep me on my plan to workout every day, which I totally adore him for.  The KICKER is that yesterday, on the treadmill, I ran for 3 minutes.  Boys and girls, Brandi is not a skinny girl nor is she a healthy in shape girl either, so that is saying a LOT.  I am NEVER able to run right away.  The normal scenario is that I get on a treadmill and walk for 20 mins at a not so quick pace.  Because of my weight, my back and feet usually start hurting too bad to do anything more than that.  And if by some chance I actually DO try to run...I can barely make it through 1 minute without completely losing my breath and wanting to quit completely.  I have really amazed myself here.  GRANTED, I broke it up into three 1 min jogs (because that what is doable for me right now...it was my third time working out) ,  I did it and that's what counts!

Let's see what the Wii Fit says:
OK so in the past three weeks, we have been changing the way we eat.  Cutting out as much BAD stuff as we could.  I have since climbed 2 separate mountains (Stone Mountain and Kennessaw Mountain) on 3 separate occasions (2x SM, 1x KM) along with small workouts on the Wii Fit.  I started on the treadmill at the gym on Thursday and Friday last week and then yesterday.  Just in the past 2 weeks, (after weighing in on my Fit and checking my graph) I have lost 8 lbs!  It's unbelievable how much better I feel.  That's what is motivating me.  I wore a shirt yesterday that I haven't worn lately because it was too tight on me.  I know an 8lb loss isn't drastic but I was amazed at what a difference it has made already!

Really, I never really wholeheartedly believed it before, but once you REALLY decide to go for it, it's kind of addicting.  I think my husband thought I was going to bail last night because I was so tired (I mean I WAS...I fell asleep on the couch sitting up for goodness sake!), but I'm tired of letting people down all the time by just doing nothing.  I wanted to prove to him that no matter how tired you get, if its something you really want, you WILL find a way to do it.  I made up my mind I was going and made myself go.  And then to be able to run like that and not be in pain and still have to desire to keep doing it, I am just amazed.

Seriously, I can't wait to go again tonight.  I'm still job hunting, and I am still dragging from being tired (I DID get a full nights sleep last night, but still lagging from previous night), so I may need a nap later.  I AM going to go again tonight and I plan to do what I did yesterday if not more.  We shall see!

OH and PS...My internet is back...obviously!  LOL

Later taters

Where is my job?

First of all, I am SO tired.  Remind me to sleep when I get home.  Seriously.

Have spent the better part of 3 hours searching online postings of jobs for things I am interested in doing or I am capable of doing.  I am kind of frustrated at the amount of CRAP that is posted on these job seeker sites.  Seriously, do these sites just post whatever is handed to them?  OBVIOUSLY!  More than half of the postings on there are all scams!  It's annoying.  Everything I have had interest in applying for today with the exception of 3 jobs, I had to google the "posters" biz to see if it came up as a scam.  Yeah, go to Google and just start typing up something like The Job Cooler...it gives you results as you type...first thing I see....SCAM.  And several others came up the same.  What happened to the good old fashioned classifieds?  I mean, even the classifieds are full of crap now.  I don't want to waste my time applying for something that is just going to wind up being a joke!  Where have all the good jobs gone?  I understand the economy isn't great and all, but good grief!  You know its pretty lousy when even dumb part time retail jobs won't call you back!

AND THEN, to add insult to injury.  When you do a job specific search and you get maybe 2 results with actual REAL jobs then the rest is just crap.  Ie. : TEST VIDEO GAMES IN YOUR HOME.  GET PAID TO SHOP. MAIL OUR FLYERS.  GET PAID TO WIPE SOMEONE'S BUTT (j/k).  Really?  What does all that crap have to do with looking for job postings of things I want to do?  I mean, do people actually fall for this crap?  Granted, I have done Mystery shopping before and anyone who has knows that you don't pay to be a mystery shopper.  If you have to pay for job...I'm sorry my friend, you've been had.  Do some sincere searching online and I guarantee you will find the real companies whom with you can apply to become a field agent and do mystery shopping.  AND even then its not a high paying gig, but if you're lucky and apply for as many opportunities, you can make a nice little wad of cash maybe to go buy yourself something fun to do ;)  But all this other crap....WHATEVER.  You have to have no sense at all to think that is real.

SIGH

In other news, I have my Mary Kay Career Conference this weekend.  I'm kinda looking forward to it mostly because I need a super charge to get out and get my butt moving with this.  It will be nice to be around other people who are successful with it, maybe meet some people from my area that I can learn from, etc.  What I'm not looking forward to is trying to find something appropriate to wear.  SIGH.  I'm hoping I can this week at some point but it's not going to be easy.  Some may find it silly and maybe even antiquated, but the company image is for women to wear skirts and panty hose.  I'm most definitely NOT a skirt and panty hose kind of girl.  I'm more of a nice pants and nice blouse kind of dresser, though it is difficult to find things that fit me well (I'm not a skinny mini girl you know).  SO...I need to find a plus size skirt suit....in black...BLAH!!!!  Too bad I'm not more successful with this yet...I could have a red jacket.  At least THEN i could have some color! LOL We'll see what happens with that I guess.  I'll be hitting up the JC Penny or Belk or something.

It's been hard for me to make the MK thing work for me, because in all honesty I don't think I portray the whole MK image/personality.  I don't know.  I've been kind of down on myself about it lately because I want so bad to be successful at it, but every time I talk about it to someone they have no interest.  How is it I manage to find every person who doesn't care about it.  How do these women go out and get all these sales and do so well all the time and I can't find one stinkin person to give a crap about it.  BOO!!
(Seriously, if anyone is reading this and IS interested please let me know! ;)  ).

Well I better be on my merry way for now.  Am at my mom's using her computer/internet.  Hoping to have mine back by Weds.  That would be nice.  I got a 30 minute drive and I don't want to get caught in traffic, so buh bye for now!  Hopefully if I update in a couple days it will be from my house!

l8tr

I Think I Need Rehab for Internet Use

I seriously do.  The first thing I did when I got to my mom's house was to jump on the computer so I could catch up with all the things I have missed out on this week.  It's an addiction. ARG.  I figured while I was here I would do a quit entry for the sake of actually being able to write (since my phone only allows me to write so many characters...).

It's nice being over here today although I left my husband at the apartment working on his car.  My youngest brother is home this week on his spring break and my dad is here this weekend too.  So all in all, it's pretty nice having the WHOLE family here at the same time.

Life has been pretty uneventful this week.  I tried going out this week applying for jobs, but still nothing.  It's starting to catch up money-wise and I DON'T like that.  Anyone want to loan me like $50?  Seriously.  I don't think we have enough money to get gas the next 2 weeks.  UGH.  I am praying that these people David has his old 401K through distribute his money to him ASAP.  We REALLY need it.

That's pretty much the center of my stress.  Lack of job and extreme lack of cash flow.  It's enough to stress anyone out that's for sure.  BUT in lieu of that stress, I am taking my energy out on trying to lose weight in my free time that I have.  It sucks, yes, but I have found that the things I use to adore to eat will now make me feel ill when I eat them.  For example, I went grocery shopping the other day and bought my one thing I get a week that I can enjoy so I don't feel like I'm on a diet really.  So I bought french fries...and not just any french fries, but CHECKER'S fries.  They are amazing and I LOVE LOVE LOVE them.  I was beside myself finding them at Walmart the other day (seriously, it's the little things in life that get me excited).  So after a VERY strenuous hike up Stone Mountain, I decided to pop them in the oven last night and have a little treat.  David and I polished them off in probably 10 minutes!  About an hour later we both felt like crap.  And even seeing things on TV that I once would have no problem eating has actually made me feel gross to look at.  I think this is good.  It means to me that my mentality is changing.  That I am accepting the fact that I can eat good food and lose weight and be happy rather than stressing out over the things I can't have.  It's also helped that we have no money to go out to eat all the time.  We got pretty lazy there for a LONG time and just went out.  Now that we are forced to have to save our money and actually buy groceries (and gasp! I had to experiment with cooking and it's been pretty good so far), we're both losing weight just because we are eating home cooked meals rather than overly fatty foods from going out.  It really makes you open your eyes and reevaluate what exactly you are putting into your body.  Even today, my dad offered me his Coke Zero and I refused it (and anyone who knows me, knows I ADORE Coke).  I haven't had an actual Coke in at LEAST 5 months I'd say.  When I want a soda, I have Sprite or Ginger Ale maybe, but I've sworn off the dark sodas and am trying to ween myself off sodas entirely.  Crystal Light has become my new best friend (as have some other sugar free products).  It's amazing how good things taste when you cut out the bad stuff.  Really they do!

SO....

I haven't been able to get out and see the new Alice in Wonderland movie yet.  I've heard mixed reviews on it.  Sounds like my sister in law approved, so it couldn't have been THAT bad (she's a huge Alice fan).  I am interested in catching it, but not anytime soon.  Have to really focus on the job hunting still.
ALSO...I've been anticipating the new Final Fantasy game coming out and have REALLY high hopes for it.  The last one was really disappointing.  (YES, I just geeked out on you there.  I LOVE to play video games...get over it).

We booked a room today with my bro-in-law & sis-in-law for a cruise in NOV.  We're going to Haiti.  Crazy huh?  My sis in law's aunt is a travel agent for cruises so she's got us hooked up. Yay!  I'm really looking forward to it.  It's a 4 day cruise on the Royal Caribbean Freedom of the Seas.  AND what is the perk I am looking forward to on the ship?  The Pharaoh's Palace...a lounge and dance floor...they do dance lessons and all sorts of crap there.  SOLD.  I'm ready to go NOW.

Other than that, I'm pretty much in a state of limbo...when I actually am able to secure a job of some sort I will let you know.  Hopefully I can get my internet back up and running here soon, so I can finally feel connected to the world again.  I can't tell you how many times I have needed to get some information on something, went to the computer only to be disappointed that I forgot I couldn't get on.  BOO!!  And seriously, while I LOVE having HD channels and cable TV and all that, once I get it paid up I think I'm going to cancel the TV and just have the internet.  It's too expensive.

That's it for now Kiddos....I'd love some comments or suggestions of things to write about.  I hate always talking about the same exact thing all the time.  Give me some inspiration friends

I Feel Like I Lost A Limb

So my internet on my computer isn't working. I am currently typing this on my cracked out phone, so if there's crazy typos I will fix it later. This will also probably look like one long paragraph and most likely won't be very long as i have noticed my phone only lets me type so many characters. I am pretty sure it doesn't work because i haven't paid my bill yet. Money is so tight I won't be able to until the 19th and for me that REALLY blows. I will get some time online this weekend at my parents house thank god. I might even try to seek out some internet time at a local library on thursday if i get too twitchy. I really do feel like i have lost a limb. I am very grateful right now that i can access my email and parts of Facebook on my phone. At least i don't feel completely disconnected. And even though it took me a couple minutes to get logged on here...i am able to write and so far phone is cooperating. I hate this though. BOOOOOO!!!!!! I reached my limit...phone is cutting me off. Laters.

Delirious

IT'S OFFICIALLY MARCH!!

(always loved this pic I took of some clover out on Tybee)

It's almost 5AM.  Yep...I'm awake. BUT I plan to not be soon. Never fear. On a side note...am I so old I'm the only one who started humming the song "Delirious" by Prince after reading/writing my title....80's child right here ;)

I know I haven't written much lately.  Was semi busy hanging with my hubby this weekend.  Other than that nothing too exciting.  Just stressing out over the lack of money and the lack of a job for me.  I put in some more applications tonight online.

One job in particular piqued my interest.  Its a job taking pictures of newborns at the hospital my husband works at (not for). I don't know if there's still a chance of me getting the job or even an interview for that matter because the job posting was put up 10 days ago.  SO.  I never noticed the listing before today though and I swear I've frequented this site every day.  Don't know how I missed it.  Anyhow, I think that would be a lot of fun, getting to take baby's first official picture.  The job pretty much said it entails going to meet the new parents and show the the packages that the company provides for the baby pictures and help the parents decide what they want to do.  It also said you have to be comfortable handling the babies too.  Which kind of made me swoon because I love babies.  And I love to take pictures.  It's kind of perfect.  Unfortunately its only part time.  It sucks, but whatever.  Right now any extra money would help.

I'm currently stressing about my car.  I have to call later on the day (considering its almost 5am) and see I can qualify for their deferment program.  They pretty much take your overdue and tack it to the end of your loan...make you pay half of the current due and then the rest at the end of the month then you pick your reg payments back up.  Sucks though because its just going to make paying off my car that much longer, but... it WILL be paid off this year.  And this makes me very happy.

As I mentioned in an earlier entry, I'm going to try to get my Mary Kay back up and running.  I signed up for Career Conference, which is on the 19th and 20th of March.  My sincere hope for this is that it does, in fact, benefit me.  I spent some time with my mom today and told her I was going to be doing that.  She was happy to hear it I think.  Its not that I don't want to do it.  I really want to be successful with it.  I see people who started the same time as me already with MK cars...c'mon!! I could totally be there by now.  I have to get that self esteem back.  Someone got a shot of liquid self esteem?

Well, I'm going to make it short for now.  Tired and ready to crawl into bed.  Funny thing is my husband should be getting up soon.  It's not really funny because he's getting up super early today to take care of some work he didn't get done last week.  He just had a bad week last week, so...I'm guessing he's just trying to get a jump on things and get caught up before his week gets too overwhelming.

Nighty night/Good Morning!

You Are Mine

I didn't write yesterday. My mind has been stuck on something lately and it's driving me nuts. I think the following is appropriate:

YOU ARE MINE

Everyone has their obsession
consuming thoughts
consuming time
they hold high their prized possession
it defines the meaning of their life

You are mine

They're our objects of affection
that can mesmerize the soul
there is always one addiction
that just can not be controlled

You are mine

Really?

Time: 9:39 pm

What I hear: The Emergency by BT

Where to begin tonight? I think I should write sooner in the evening because I seem to be a bit more sane. The later it gets the wackier I get, so we'll see where this goes.

First of all...WHY are Sock Monkeys $30? It's a stuffed animal for goodness sake! I know it sounds strange, but my husband has been on a sock monkey kick for about a month now and I really want to find one for him, but $30? REALLY? I don't know why the man wants one, but he does. And you know what started it? That commercial they showed during the Super Bowl with the toys all riding around bowling and jet skiing and stuff. And when he saw the sock monkey on there he proclaimed that he thought they were cool and he wanted one. I kinda find it strange, but whatever. I love him, so I want to find one. I'm sure I could find one on ebay(yep there's some on there running about $10 - 25). And he doesn't want the creepy looking one with the buggy eyes. He wants the original sock monkey.

So that's one of my quests right now. Weird.

David also pointed out to me today something pretty cool that we would both LOVE to do, but financially its not going to happen. It's this HUGE dance music festival at the end of March in Miami. Wish we both had decent jobs because several of our faves will be there (minus BT unfortunately...that would be the deal breaker I think....LOVE BT!!) The cost reminds me a little of Fan Fair (CMA Music Fest whatever its called now) except FF lasts 4 days whereas this one only lasts 2. It's a 12 hour drive to get to Miami from here, so gas would suck, then hotel, food and $280 for both of us to get in to this thing. I'd love to do it, but that is something you plan all year to attend and it's not gonna happen in a month for us. So, we're kinda bummed, but now that we know about it we will definitely plan for next year.

Tomorrow I get some freedom. I have to get up super early and take hubby to work so I can have the car. Am going job hunting tomorrow. I have absolutely no idea where I am going other than the Publix down the street to see if they need a cake decorator in the bakery. I know David would kill me, but I COULD hit up the Hallmark since I worked for them in Savannah (there's a store right down the street from me owned by the same people who own the Savannah store), but the only way I would work for that store is just to do stock or displays or things of the like. I don't want to do sales or whatever. AND I KNOW they already suck on the pay scale so I don't think I should waste my time, but who knows? I do know they are moving locations I think next week so maybe they could use some help doing that.

Anyway, other than that I don't know what I am going to do. I wish there were a reliable job finding site that winnowed out the fake jobs from the real ones. I hate seeing 200 postings for MYSTERY SHOPPING JOBS! WORK FROM HOME JOBS! etc etc. You know what I am talking about.

UM...I think I am going to do a bit of research tonight and create some flyers I can post at the mail centers in my complex here for my Mary Kay. Of all jobs I could look for, my MK biz would profit me the most if I could just figure it out and quit being such a chicken to go out and meet people. There's a Career Conference on the 19th and 20th of next month I really want to go. I really need to get my butt in gear with it. It could be so much more beneficial to me than working my butt off with someone else telling me what to do and when I can and can't go do the things I want to do. I just need to be harder on myself to get out there and do it.

You know what's funny about doing MK to me though? I can see myself doing the business. I can literally visualize it in my head being outgoing and doing the classes and getting to know people and having money and driving the cars and everything, but for some reason in real life I CLAM UP and just can't bring myself to do it. I'm only standing in my own way and that drives me nuts! What is wrong with me? I think if I make myself some new temporary business cards (until I can afford to order a new set), make up some flyers and try to get a class going...just to see where that gets me here. I have to do something with all this time I am wasting at home every day. (THANKS ME FOR VENTING ON MY BLOG...I'm feeling slightly motivated)

Ok enough for now. I have some work to do. Leave me some love, browse my MK site to humor me (sorry you are allergic Meg...that sucks), whatever.

♥♥ ME

Here I Am

Time: 2:46am

What i hear : Here I Am by Kaskade

You know, I wish I was an interesting person. I wish I had something interesting to write about really. Those of you who actually read this crap must really have nothing better to do with your time.

I am a multi-crafter. You know, because I get bored so easily. I have so many little projects I start and I can focus on one for a little while. I eventually get tired of it and pick up something else. And I NEVER finish anything before I move onto starting something new. WHICH I've noticed is pretty much how I do ANYTHING in my life. I start all these little whatnots and never follow through with finishing them. The only thing I have really followed through with lately is the cake decorating thing (and I still have 2 classes I have to be fully finished with it...the next course is all about fondant and gum paste and my final cake is a wedding cake. Yippee).

I don't think I really know WHO I am anymore. I know what I am good at and I know I could be good at a couple things, but I never follow through. It's all in that self confidence thing. I've noticed I'm starting to clam up a bit more in public now too. All this being cooped up at home all the time...I DON'T LIKE IT. I asked hubby to leave my car tomorrow so I could get out and apply for jobs, but he's actually got an interview for an outreach job to earn a little extra money. I know why he's doing it, but if he'd actually leave me with my car I could have gotten a job by now. Granted, he is finally making strides to getting his car "rubberized" on the inside and trying to put in some weather stripping to stop all the water from getting in, so he has taken the seats out of the car. SO makes it kind of hard for him to drive it.

Anyway long story short, I think I'm going to have the car on Thursday, so i can get out and get myself some work. As much as I love sleeping in and not having any work obligations now, I really need my sanity back. I need my freedom and some interaction with people in front of me.

It's funny. I have friends here in Atlanta. One of my best friends lives maybe 15-20 mins away from me now and I never see her. Other friends live 30 mins away and I never see them either. No one ever calls me or texts me anymore (I don't know why I even have a phone), I feel totally disconnected from the world. My mother told me recently that I spend too much time online, but hell...it's the only way I stay connected. At least online I have some people I can talk to, things to take out my boredom on, outlets like this blog to get all the jumbled mess of thoughts in my head out on.

I want things to be good and right now they aren't. Money is tight because I'm not working. We have too many bills. I thought my car was almost paid off and it's looking like it won't be paid off until September now. The excess we DID have, we squandered away and now I have all this stuff looming over me.

I did find a job posting for a teacher's assistant the other day. Starting pay was like 41K, which to me is GREAT, but it was working in a class room with special ed kids. NOT that I have anything against special ed kids. I just know it takes very special people to be able to work with kids like that. I know it is difficult to do (hell my mother in law used to do that as her job when she still actually worked). Personally I don't know how I could do it. People tell me all the time how much patience I have...like it's out of this world; they have never known anyone as patient as I am. And I think that would help, but I don't know. There are other teaching assistant jobs and the pay is still ok 30-35K working with regular kids. Is it bad I'm looking at that 41K as opposed to less to work with regular kids. Should I just apply to it and see what happens? I'm looking at it and its not a normal school....its at a intensive residential treatment center (which to me translates to mental hospital...is that wrong?)

EDIT: On a bit of researching it seems that the sites posting these "jobs" are phishing scams....LOVELY...well there goes my small bit of hope...

I know it sounds awful and I shouldn't let it motivate me, but I've never made more than 20K a year. HOW SAD IS THAT!!?? I'm 30 years old....you would think I would have achieved some sort of success by this point. I just look lazy and unmotivated. Which, to be honest, is how I feel.

I'm getting sleepy so I'll write more later. One of these days these entries might contain some semblance of being organized, but that's not how my brain works these days...

♥ ME

Random first thoughts: This is ME

I've noticed that I tend to blog song lyrics. I've had to restrain myself from doing this as a starting point for this new blog. It's very hard to resist.

I guess I should do an official introduction.

HI, I'm Brandi or Brandivah...whatever you feel like calling me. I'm 30 years old and I live in Marietta, GA which is Metro Atlanta (the ATL city limits aren't too far from here, so most days I will just say I live in Atlanta....just go with it). Currently I am unemployed and it's really starting the hurt. My husband, David, and I are currently sharing my car. It's not a very fair share though with him getting it all week and I only get to drive it during the weekend. We're trying to get his car in better shape so he can start driving it again. Currently it is suffering from some serious leakage...and no, not that car itself is leaking. More like water is getting in somehow and we really don't know what to do ourselves to fix it. BUT HEY, it's an old Corvette and we love it. :)

Now that I've gone off on a little ramble about the damn cars, let's see what's next?

*clears throat

SOMEONE HIRE ME!!!! I am looking at maybe getting a job as a cake decorator if I can find something available. I also sell Mary Kay, but haven't been active since before we moved from Savannah (WOW...its almost been 3 months since we moved back).

I'm originally from the Atlanta area. I moved to Atlanta with my family when I was 6. I lived here all the way through high school. I went to Valdosta State University for college (and have a degree I don't use) and shortly after finishing my student teaching, I decided to follow my (at the time) fiancee, now husband, to Savannah so I could be with him. The past 5 years we have lived in 5 different places with one of them being his parents house (was the most tortuous year and 1/2 of my life) and 4 different apartments. I was miserable living in Savannah, but right before we got married, we moved out to the islands and I was 10 minutes from the beach. THE BEACH...my most favorite place to be. It was VERY difficult to leave it. I now know that whenever we retire, it's definitely going to be on a beach.

ANYWAY

Now I've been jobless for almost 3 months. TRAPPED in my apartment every day...going slightly mental with every passing day. I told my husband this past weekend that I was happy he met me for lunch on Friday and let me have my car. I felt liberated and more like myself. This being at home thing every day and having no transportation on the off chance I want to go somewhere. IT SUCKS...

2010...this also marks something else for me...my personal struggle the past 10 years with my weight. All the broken promises I've made to myself to try and lost weight. 9 and 11/12s of those years were all for appearance purposes. Only recently have I opened my eyes a bit and realized that I was wanting to lose it for vanity reasons. Now I'm realizing I am just cutting my lifespan shorter by being like this. I want to live as long as I can and I DEFINITELY do not want to live another 10 years like this. I SWORE I would not look the way I do when I turned 30, but alas, another broken promise to myself. THIS TIME, I've got to do it. I've also realized lately I have an addiction to sugar. I try to be healthy but I always wind up caving and binging on sugary things. It's not good for me (in more ways than one). I'm also a boredom eater, which is probably why I always have to have something to do to cure the urge to eat. I'm really struggling right now. I did good for a week, but have already fallen off the horse. I promised myself that tomorrow I would get back on it. I'm unhappy with me, and that's a hard thing for me to admit out loud.

I'm also not getting any younger. My husband and I both want us to have kids...LIKE 2 years ago....we've been, obviously, very unsuccessful with that and I chalk it up to my weight. I'm not healthy and I think I've been slightly insane the past 2 years thinking that being pregnant at my weight I'd be ok. I'm a firm believer in everything happening for a reason and I KNOW that there's a reason we don't have a kid yet. I need to stop thinking of things in the wrong order. I need to fix me first; physically and emotionally and financially.

OH man, I've been listening to a playlist the whole time I've been writing. As my shirt says "Music is my life". Some songs seem to just come on at the right time and it just FITS that moment.

I need help. And I need support of people who will continually be there for me. My husband is always supportive of me, but because of that he has a soft spot for being stern with me about things. I need some serious encouragement. I need people that I can feel the need to not let down, if THAT makes any sense. And while I have friends who are really sweet...I can't recall a single person who goes out of their way for me like I do for them (aside from my mother and husband). I really need someone to do that for me. It's been so long and so hard and I've lost myself and my self confidence that I give up WAY TOO EASY....I don't even know who I am anymore.

End ramble for now...I've been writing for 30 minutes straight and my thoughts are too jumbled for now.

More tomorrow when I have a chance of a clearer head.

(NOTE TO SELF...DO NOT GO GET FREE PANCAKES AT IHOP....YOU DON'T NEED IT)

Thank you Madonna....you capped it off tonight

Devil Wouldn't Recognize You

First Entry

So I just wanted to type something to start. I will add more later when I actually have something to say